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Waiting for the Other Shoe Store to Drop

Some days I feel like a guy in front of one of those old 1970’s control boards.  You know, like the ones from those NASA moon shot days ?  Lots of lights on a big console.  When there is a trouble somewhere, a red light would flash and you would flip a switch to deal with the problem.  Then more lights, more switches until there is a fury of lights and switch flipping.  Kind of felt like that this week, just lots and lots of things happening.  PICC lines clogging… again.  No appetite, again… Nausea and vomiting, again and again and this time our last line of defense, IV gravol is slowly starting to loose its efficacy.  Zofran never really cut it, even though its their drug of choice.  So now a new sub lingual wafer, but its one of those scary sounding off label drugs that we need to balance off barfing and… well, the other potentially worse side effects.

Never really got any closure on the CT scan.  Its just going to be yet another thing to just put off and “deal with later”.  Our surgeon, who we also really like and trust, took the time to discuss it with us.  Although he had not yet looked at the report nor looked at the imaging, he would, and he will.  But it boils down to this.  If it is metastatic spread, well, we are doing everything we can and should–radiation and chemo.  If its not, there is no easy way to find out un-intrusively.  And why the 2 months ?  Because typically there will not be any more information to be learned in a such a period of time, and it just stresses people out waiting for report after report…. Yikes

I dont really like that answer, but I can understand it… and we will have to learn how to live with it…. So, one more thing to add to the list.




About In the Cancer Bubble

I am Kathleen's partner of almost 25yrs supporting her through this very tough and rough spot.

2 responses to “Waiting for the Other Shoe Store to Drop

  1. Colleen ⋅

    It is like a huge roller coaster you are all on. When I read your blog, I am reminded of this puzzle also, following along with the coaster, side by side. Gosh, we wish we mould solve this puzzle for you quickly and stop that coaster! I want to let you know Kath, that we were glad and very up to see you walk in the restaurant the other day for lunch with us. How was that sucker? I think it was the best part of that whole lunch 🙂 It was nice also to have Elaine here with us again last night. I am hoping to come again soon and spend some time on my own for a visit with you and your Mom. I will continue to send those positive vibes your way in spirit! …..Colleen

  2. Alyson ⋅

    Christa emailed me tonight to tell me of your illness (not sure “illness” really covers things). Reading about your journey as told by Mike is very moving. You have a warm circle of friends and family who I hope bring you comfort. Glad to see Betty sitting on the chair waiting for her chicken!

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